Alarming Tips When Dealing With Difficult Children
Have you ever been at the grocery store and you see a parent struggling with their child throwing a tantrum in the checkout line. In your mind your thinking “ Gee, I’m glad that’s not my child”. Here are some tips when dealing with difficult children.
Well, what do you do if you are the parent in that situation. All kids throw tantrums, but what do you do when it’s your child that’s being the difficult one? Here are some things parents should know when it comes to dealing with difficult children.
Dealing with Difficult Children: Stand Your Ground
To prevent embarrassing situations like public outburst, what you can do is to make sure your child knows that this behavior is not acceptable, not even at home.
If your child is throwing a huge tantrum because you wouldn’t give them another cookie, let them know that you understand they are upset but they are NOT going to get another cookie. Draw boundaries and let them know that you are going to stand your ground and pretty soon they’ll realize that throwing a fit will be futile for them. Whatever you do, do not give in and give your child that cookie. That is not the way to prevent situations like that dealing with difficult children.
By giving in to their tantrum, this will only show them that in the future, if they cried loud and hard enough, you will them what they want. This is why many kids throw tantrums in public, because they know if they cried hard enough, they’ll get what they want, or something close to what they want.
Many parents feel awful when they see their child cry. If your child isn’t hurt (sad), hungry or thirsty and their just throwing a fit because they don’t want to go to bed, let them cry. By allowing them one more book to read or one more glass of water, they know that they are prolonging their bedtime.
Usually in embarrassing public outburst, parents give in pretty quick just to avoid the embarrassment of a screaming child.
Many parents think of themselves as awful parents for telling their child no or not giving them what they want, but keep in mind that setting boundaries will teach your child that they can’t always get what they want. Do you want to raise a bratty and spoiled child? If not, then don’t feel bad about not giving in to your child’s every whim.
Dealing With Difficult Children: Give Them Their Own Space
I have met kids in my time that when they throw tantrums, they go into complete meltdown modes. It’s almost shocking to see a complete meltdown. If your child has gotten to the point of no return and is just insoluble, give them space. Give them space and room to breathe.
If you try to console them at this point, there is a strong possibility that you will make it worst. Once they have calmed down a bit, then it’s ok to approach them. Make sure when you speak to them you are at eye level, not hovering over them, get on your knees and use a calm voice. Eye contact is very important when dealing with difficult children.
Dealing With Difficult Children: Give Them Options
This is my own little power tool I use. It works like a charm (even with toddlers). When it’s time to do something, say for example, it’s time to put their jackets on because you’re going outside and you can tell they’re going to throw a big fit about it. Ask them, “would you like to put your jacket on by yourself or do you need my help”? This way, you are giving them choices but in the end, you are still getting them to do what you want them to do.
Kids love to feel in control of the situation. Knowing this is important when it comes to dealing with difficult children. If it’s time to go to bed, give them options. “Do you want to walk to your room like a big boy or girl or do you need my help?” If they don’t make a choice, instantly pick them up and CARRY them to their bedroom.
This way, the next time you ask them this question, they’ll most likely get up and walk to their room themselves. This trick works every time. Give them plenty of choices and they will choose the lesser evil but when it comes down to it, you are still getting them to do what you want!
Being a parent dealing with difficult children is no easy task. Keep these things I’ve stated above in mind when it comes to dealing with tantrums. This will prevent embarrassing tantrums.